What the hell?

What's the point of this piece of paper?

Ah, yes. The joys associated with ass kissing in cover letters, objective statements, and "gosh, darn, let me work at your company" marathon groveling sessions.

And so my weekend went.

OBJECTIVE: Must be home in time to watch "ER." Sufficient time must be allowed for personal shopping and errand running during normal business hours. Clothing allowance negotiable.

EDUCATION: Yes.

SKILLS: Basically anything I can pass off as my own. Oh, and I'm really good at lifting office supplies. Need an extra hole punch?

REFERENCES: No, unfortunately all of my previous bosses are clinically insane.* But here, call some of my peers that will claim to be my superiors. GIve me a heads up and I'll buy them a shot. Thanks.
** sadly that's the truth with some of the crackpots that made over 100K.What would make the job search process infinitely more useful (and entertaining) for the brilliant folks in HR?
Categories like Weakness, Past Lies, Disasters and Outright Failures.

But no. Skip that and focus your attention on the cover letter that no one is ever going to read. Include doozies like"I've been unemployed for the past year, but I need something to do, and I'm tired of being sponsored by MasterCard."

;)

posted by irene @ 10/14/2002 02:34:00 AM